Breaking the Habit - Linkin Park
We all have habits that we just can seem to, for lack of a better word, break.
I am definitely not immune to this rule of life.
[Oh god. I feel a top ten five list coming on.]
1. Apologizing.
Now I'm not saying that apologizing is a bad thing.It's a terrible thing!It's really something that people should do sometimes, obviously. But I apologize for every fucking thing. [Oh, sorry for cuss--....I mean...] I've gotten to the point where I have realized that maybe I'm not sorry. I can't walk on eggshells around everyone just because I'm scared to hurt some feelings. People need to grow up.
2. Procrastinating.
I have four chapters worth of AP Chem due. Nuff said.
3. Eating badly.
I eat maybe two meals a day. This isn't because I am all "I'm fat. I must not eat." It's just that when I get stressed, I don't get hungry, which is horrible because then I'm tired all the damn time. I know, I know. You're thinking, "Dude. Shut the hell up and eat something." No! I'm not hungry right now. [Btw, off topic, everyone try the Coca Cola milkshake at Applebees. ♥♥♥]
4. Biting my nails.
This one also connects to stress. Last week, all of my fingers were bleeding on a daily basis because I bit them into tiny little nubs. It was uber cute.
5. Crying when I get really angry.
Dude. Back in the day, I had some pretty severe anger problems. If my sister was asked about it...you don't even want to know. She used to bug me until I beat the crap out of her. Then I moved on to using my words to beat people up. I can't tell you how many people I made cry at that point in my life. When I hit sophomore year though, I mellowed to an extreme. The other day in Chem, my teacher made me so angry. My response? To start balling as soon as I left the room. Hardcore, right? It almost makes me want to go back to the violent responses. Almost.
Tonight was fun. Q and I just stayed in and watched Star Wars [the original one] together.
I've never seen them before. [I know. It's supposedly a crime against humanity or something? Meh. Who knows.]
I've decided. R2D2 is my favorite. He just makes me smile every time he comes on the screen. Awwww....
I've just got to focus for the rest of the week because I'm going to Athens on Friday. [Mom's going to the B52 concert. She went to high school with them, so all of their friends are getting together.]
Time for bed. Buenas noches.
4 Comments
My mom yells at me everytime she sees my fingers near or in my mouth! SHe hates when people bite their nails so she has even threatened to take things away from me if she sees me biting them! I keep mine painted to avoid that haha!
Procrastination....yeahh lemme know if you figure out how to stop this one hahah! I am a terrible procrastinator. For some reason homework just seems better to do at 11 than 4 haha! I need to stop. I had this research paper due a few months back and the whole week I had worked a little on it, but the night before at like 11 I finished it only to find out it didn't save. You think that would have taught me somehting...but no.
I also cry when I get angry. My eyes just water a lot I think. Because when I laugh my eyes water, even if I don't laugh that hard at all. I used to be really mean. To the point where I could make people cry. But I've really gotten past that. I think mellow is the right word.
I know what you mean about getting angry and crying. Happens to me all of the time. I hate confused emotions.
And I definately procrastinate. It's a horrible habit! If you can break it, do it! =]