Sunday, February 27, 2011

"Starting from zero, got nothing to lose."

Fast Car - Tracy Chapman

I've decided that I am going to try out for GT color guard.

For those of you who are cool fortunate LAME enough to not be in band, the color guard is the group of girls who spin the flags and stuff during halftime shows.

I know what you're thinking. DB, grow up and stop being so lame. But DB, you've never done color guard before. What makes you think that you can make it? 

I don't, actually. Think I can make it. But I'm going to be rooming with Amanda, who was the guard captain at my high school, and I promised her and my mother that I would try out with her. She and this year's captain are going to be brainwashing training me later this week.

See, it's like this. Once you join band, do it for a year and decide if it is something that you are wanting to be serious about. If it isn't? Quit. After freshman year. Don't wait until after sophomore year like I did. By then, you've already been hooked. It's like being in a gang. You might say that you quit....but you didn't. You can't. Everyone gives you dirty looks in the hallway and whispers angry things about you as you pass. [You think I'm exaggerating, but I'm not. I cannot tell you how many times I was called a traitor as I passed my ex-band mates.]

Now, even after I've left the program my senior year, I still get guilted into coming back and doing a parade. And when I'm done with that, I assume I'm done...forever.

But no. It seems that all the band mothers are starting their duties back up. We are each being pressured to do college band. "But, sweetie, I really would prefer that you had a built in support group at school. It would make me much more comfortable! I mean, you enjoyed it so much in high school....!"

And I'm weak, you guys. Weak.

We'll see. 

Last time they tried to teach me can be summed up in this conversation after I got smacked in the face with the flag:

"Aw...DB, are you crying?! It'll be okay!"
"Damn it, Caitlyn! I just got smashed in the nose with a metal pole! My eyes are watering!"
"Oh...Well...In that case, stand back up and throw it again."

May the force be with y'all.


Samantha said...

I don't mean to laugh at your pain....but that is hilarious! Your posts always make me laugh!!!!

Good luck!

Kate said...

I've seen color guard at other schools but my school's wayyy too small to have one. And I've always thought it looks hard. God know I'm not coordinated enough to do it. Good luck!